Top Ten Actors with Mustaches

For the ladies at Valentine’s, here’s a list for you.  Today I was considering the power of the mustache, and how to spell it.   For kicks, I made a list of the top ten actors with the best moustaches ever.  EVER.  If this doesn’t get viewers, nothing will.  MUSTACHE HO! Moustache?  Whatever.

stache510.  Will Ferrell – Ferrell gets mention only because he makes comedy and the fake moustache look good.  I think it’s fake anyway.  Anchorman reminded me of old-time, classic comedies that actually had a few good jokes, silly situations, and the overacting just made it better.

9.  Charles Bronson –stache Does he kick ass? Yes.  Does he have a good moustache?  Yes? Whatever the facial arrangement, Charles Bronson’s Death Wish movies are classic crime drama movies. At least the first couple.  Some people think they’re schlock.  No no.  Death Wish tosses out everything except the things we like: good action, shooting, and Charles Bronson kicking ass.  With a Moustache.

stache2stache18.  Billy Dee Williams – This wouldn’t be a list about the ‘stache without mention of Billy Dee Williams.  Famous for Lando on Star Wars, he worked the ‘stache like it was going out of style.  I’ll tell you this: if there’s a guy as cool as Lando in Star Wars episode VII, I will be surprised.  

7.  Burt Reynolds – Burt Reynolds could have the moustache with the most manly machismo around.  There’s no doubt about it, he carried all those manly movies in the 70s and 80s just based on his look and his attitude and his moustache.  Cannonball Run still is a cool movie.  If nothing else, it’s a good car flick.

6.  Clark Gable – To bring some dignity to this list, I had to include a celebrated actor like Clark Gable.  His moustache reeks of class.  I’ve never seen any picture anywhere anytime with Clark Gable’s moustache out of place.  In fact, I’ve never seen a picture where he’s unkempt period.  Maybe I need to see more pictures.

5.  Gene Wilder – We’re actually going down, not up on this list with Gene Wilder.  I’m joking.  Gene Wilder movies are some of the most classic comedies ever made.  The toilet humor political shock crap that is put out these days wishes they could be like a Gene Wilder comedy. 

4.  George Clooney – This is a man not afraid to reshape his moustache or lose it altogether.  He’s gone without a ‘stache for many years, then went full beard for a while.  Everyone cares for some reason.  The only thing I wonder about is why he dumped Stacey Keibler.  

3.  Richard Pryor – There probably wouldn’t be as many aggressive comedians today without the likes of Richard Pryor.  His movies may not be my thing, but he has an impressive moustache.  

stache42.  Sean Connery – When he sports the moustache, Sean Connery just looks more English for some reason.  He went hairless on the upper lip as James Bond, but he sports a moustache in plenty of other movies far more celebrated than Bond.  A Bridge Too Far, Highlander, and The Untouchables all have classic Connery ‘staches.

1.  Tom Selleck – This guy even tops Burt Reynolds in the moustache department, and perhaps the women department too.  He was king of television for a time and I don’t think anyone on this list can top that.  Magnum PI is classic television, with classic cars, good stories, and plenty of moustache.  The guys get hot chicks and the ladies get some moustache. You’re welcome.