How is Assassin’s Creed crap?

The reviews are right.  Assassin’s Creed (2016) is crap.  It’s a terrible movie.  Was this a quickie?  Or some rookie’s pet project?  How is this so bad?  

There are some great people in the cast.  It’s got the usually dependable Michael Fassbender. Oscar winners Marion Cotillard and Jeremy Irons are support and there’s plenty of other good actors in the cast, including other Oscar winners.  They won’t win an Oscar for this one.  

The script is at fault here.  The story flips around and we move back and forth between the modern-day setting and the past, which I guess is not really a traditional way of telling a story.  Even the action is offbeat and has a unique take, as the main character fights virtual shadows or some crap like that.  I don’t get it.  

The plot also makes no sense.  Some guy is about to be given lethal injection but is saved by a cabal of treasure hunters or something, then sent on a super secret mission.  That’s right, some capital crime convict is the hero of this movie.  Honestly, I haven’t played the Assassin’s Creed video game, so I’m not really the target audience of this movie.  Many of the details probably come from the game, and that’s sort of a problem for newcomers.  

Overall, this movie is terrible.  They should have made a traditional story, not played experimental with plot and style.  It’s hard enough being a video game adaptation.  The all-star cast doesn’t help this movie at all, which is probably pretty surprising.  Fassbender does alright with the crappy script, but everyone else is pretty bad, especially Marion Cotillard and Jeremy Irons, who are bland personified.  This one might be good for a rental, but I doubt it.  Maybe on a long plane trip as a freebie.

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